Hi! I just dropped by to let you all know that I have a new poem and accompanying collage that was published inThe Winged Moon magazine, a beautifully curated collection of poetry and art.
This online publication just keeps getting better, and I’m proud to be in such great company. The quality of the poetry and art is just astounding! I encourage you to check out the publication and see all the beauty it has to offer. Issue three was completely inspired by nature.
I will do a paperback version of the book as well, even if just so that I can hold my own book in my hand one day. But for the moment, I can’t say when I will be able to get this work done.
As some of you know, I have chronic fatigue syndrome, but I’m required to work as much as I can. So I have been trying to build up my work hours, and something has got to give. Currently, I’m struggling with severe mental and physical backlash from working. I’m no longer able to give as much effort to my creative practice.
I have to take a step back from my blog, my social media, all my lovely plans that I had made, and all you lovely people who pour so much creative joy into the world each day.
It may seem strange to just drop this book here, and then say goodbye, or see you later. But that’s the way it has to be for now. I’m completely overwhelmed. We are not free in this world. We have responsibilities that we can’t choose.
I hope my body and brain adjusts to the increase in activity, and that in the near future I will be able to both work and be here to share and read more poetry. In the mean time, take good care of yourselves, and don’t let the b’s grind you down!
Today I’d like to share the foreword from my upcoming poetry and essay collection with you. Waking Up To Thrutopia will be available from Amazon for Kindle and in print soon!
Thrutopia is a word coined by British philosopher Rupert Read in an article published on the British Huffington Post website in November of 2017. What Thrutopia means can’t be explained by a simple definition, but it’s a contraction of the words “through” and “utopia”.
Inspired by a story by American author Ursula K. Le Guin, Read realised that to strive for a utopia can only ever be that. Utopia cannot exist; all we can do is to try to get there and that is actually where utopia resides. In other words, we need to get through the difficult and hard times to get to some place that’s better.
I’ve been struggling with a chronic illness for almost 20 years, and to get to a better place, I’ve had to deal with my past. I’ve had to reveal behaviours and thought patterns that I was oblivious to. That’s what this collection of poems and essays is about.
This is a very personal collection of some of my favourite writings from the last three years, with new material added. In the process of writing, I realised that I had become stuck in a state of victimhood. I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with writing about pain and dark moments. I know that this kind of writing can resonate with people who are similarly struggling, and it makes them feel validated and less alone. But for my own physical and mental wellbeing, it has become increasingly important to me to frame my own dis-ease in the wider context of the ills of our societies. That’s why this book is divided into three parts which represent a sort of journey.
The first part takes you through a personal world shaped by trauma and loss, exploring how the past affects the present.
In part two I attempt to elucidate the healing process. I ask hard questions as my tender rebellion against the status quo begins to take shape.
The final part foreshadows, warns, hopes, plans. I’m saying that it’s easy to get things wrong, but we must try to change our destiny by coming to terms with our true nature.
I hope that you’ll find something that resonates with you in this journey.
I hope that this introduction clarified a few things for you, about why I’m publishing this book and how I’ve put it together. I hope to have the manuscript in good shape soon. It’s the first time I’m going through the self-publishing process, and it’s a learning curve for sure! Making the front cover of the book has actually been much easier for me than formatting the manuscript itself. But I’ll be back soon with more news!
If you’ve been reading my work for a while, you will have noticed that I don’t shy away from writing about highly personal, and often painful, experiences. I suppose my urge to write has come from a need to get a handle on situations that have uprooted me and have sent me on a journey of self-discovery.
This essay, that was just published for the first time by fellow poet Jai-Michelle Louissen in her Substack magazine The Winged Moon, tells the story of a woman who was set adrift by a creeping chronic illness and a disintegrating relationship. Having grown up on the Belgian coast, I was compelled to use the imagery of a submerged land, called Doggerland, to build a poetic mindscape that mirrored my emotional state during these hard years.
This essay means a lot to me, because of the subject matter, and also because it’s my first proper lyrical essay (in a braided form, to use technical language). It would mean the world to me if you could go to the magazine and read it.
You may be asked to sign up with your email, but it’s free to do so!
I hope you like what you read there! (The other poems and art are absolutely wonderful!)
The first time my poem “Please pay at the reception desk on your way out” was published was in the late autumn of 2020. It was accepted by Blanket Sea, a small indie publication dedicated to poetry about chronic illness. I received the honour of having my poem nominated for the Best of the Net Awards that year.
But the poem’s journey didn’t end there. I have been lucky enough to have this poem picked up a second time. This time it’s appearing in Kaleidoscope magazine, a publication run by United Disability Services (Ohio, US), that creatively focuses on the experiences of disability through literature and the fine arts.
Please visit the online edition of Kaleidoscope: Issue 86 to read my poem (it’s on p. 61) and enjoy essays, short fiction, art, and more on the theme of discovering unexpected truths.