Hi! I just dropped by to let you all know that I have a new poem and accompanying collage that was published in The Winged Moon magazine, a beautifully curated collection of poetry and art.
This online publication just keeps getting better, and I’m proud to be in such great company. The quality of the poetry and art is just astounding! I encourage you to check out the publication and see all the beauty it has to offer. Issue three was completely inspired by nature.
I’m glad to announce that my poetry collection is now available (Kindle version) almost worldwide on Amazon. You can find the links to an Amazon store close to you on the books page.
The paperback version will be available in the beginning of the summer!
My poetry and essay collection Waking up to Thrutopia (Kindle edition) is out now!
You can find it at an Amazon near you. Visit the books page for links.
I will do a paperback version of the book as well, even if just so that I can hold my own book in my hand one day. But for the moment, I can’t say when I will be able to get this work done.
As some of you know, I have chronic fatigue syndrome, but I’m required to work as much as I can. So I have been trying to build up my work hours, and something has got to give. Currently, I’m struggling with severe mental and physical backlash from working. I’m no longer able to give as much effort to my creative practice.
I have to take a step back from my blog, my social media, all my lovely plans that I had made, and all you lovely people who pour so much creative joy into the world each day.
It may seem strange to just drop this book here, and then say goodbye, or see you later. But that’s the way it has to be for now. I’m completely overwhelmed. We are not free in this world. We have responsibilities that we can’t choose.
I hope my body and brain adjusts to the increase in activity, and that in the near future I will be able to both work and be here to share and read more poetry. In the mean time, take good care of yourselves, and don’t let the b’s grind you down!
after Charles Bukowski and Mauro Zappaterra
Cerebrospinal fluid is one molecule away from seawater1,
the way it licks at your seat,
only half a can’s worth of your favourite soft drink,
discarded on the beach,
it runs all way down the spinal cord to the sacrum,
deep, deep, deep.
A briny balm for the brain,
drunk with sunlight,
it coddles baby neurons, teaches them to grow.
Where the serpent heads meet at the third eye,
out out out,
a crystal-filled cave receiving
transmissions of light, vibration, molecules.
Something outside of me,
I am appears and with it the birth
of the existential novel.
We are born and we die with a soft spot,
the book in our lap tilted
and not quite true.
1 At the end of the video this poem was also inspired by, Zappaterra says cerebrospinal fluid is not actually just one molecule away from seawater. However, he continues to explain why it can be seen as an “inner sea” that we carry with us. I liked the opening line of the poem, so I didn’t want to change it.
Here’s a poem from my upcoming poetry and essay collection Waking up to Thrutopia.
After Fran Lock and Tsoknyi Rinpoche
In winter coastal skies are powder and mollified. Here, sand
cliffs, a tramcar’s white zoom, seagulls, flags,
a north wind that slaps cheeks with a sole and leaves
salt on lips. Cut off from the dog parade, where
ruddy turnstones scatter as if let go out of a bottle. On days like these
misfortune meets us waspish and thin. We are seven-hour flowers, waiting
for the shadow to wintle from the cloudless sky like serein.
But it’s more than Hypnos that keeps us tied to our beds,
a sadness set deep in days, sends us browsing for a vibe
shift. Away from minds that run on rails, buckled to overhead
wires, same stitched and padded coats, opinions arranged neatly in rows.
The pilea by the window needs a stick and some yarn to stay upright, and
its round leaves yearn towards the low light. Could this offshoot
drop into its body, could we drop into our bodies and find an ember.
Because its not enough to reside in the white room, where thoughts waft
like ghosts until a comforter of snow weighs them down and covers them.
Could we start to write the book of sort of okayness, fill the pages with more
than asemic writing, a guide of sorts for everyone who struggles, so everyone.
Thrutopia is a word coined by British philosopher Rupert Read in an article published on the British Huffington Post website in November of 2017. What Thrutopia means can’t be explained by a simple definition, but it’s a contraction of the words “through” and “utopia”.
Inspired by a story by American author Ursula K. Le Guin, Read realised that to strive for a utopia can only ever be that. Utopia cannot exist; all we can do is to try to get there and that is actually where utopia resides. In other words, we need to get through the difficult and hard times to get to some place that’s better.
I’ve been struggling with a chronic illness for almost 20 years, and to get to a better place, I’ve had to deal with my past. I’ve had to reveal behaviours and thought patterns that I was oblivious to. That’s what this collection of poems and essays is about.
This is a very personal collection of some of my favourite writings from the last three years, with new material added. In the process of writing, I realised that I had become stuck in a state of victimhood. I don’t think that there’s anything wrong with writing about pain and dark moments. I know that this kind of writing can resonate with people who are similarly struggling, and it makes them feel validated and less alone. But for my own physical and mental wellbeing, it has become increasingly important to me to frame my own dis-ease in the wider context of the ills of our societies. That’s why this book is divided into three parts which represent a sort of journey.
The first part takes you through a personal world shaped by trauma and loss, exploring how the past affects the present.
In part two I attempt to elucidate the healing process. I ask hard questions as my tender rebellion against the status quo begins to take shape.
The final part foreshadows, warns, hopes, plans. I’m saying that it’s easy to get things wrong, but we must try to change our destiny by coming to terms with our true nature.
I hope that you’ll find something that resonates with you in this journey.
I hope that this introduction clarified a few things for you, about why I’m publishing this book and how I’ve put it together. I hope to have the manuscript in good shape soon. It’s the first time I’m going through the self-publishing process, and it’s a learning curve for sure! Making the front cover of the book has actually been much easier for me than formatting the manuscript itself. But I’ll be back soon with more news!
Tender Rebellion 